by Liam Scheff
“Christian Apologetics and AIDS Fundamentalists.”
What is Apologetics? It’s the process of arguing about mythology with people who don’t know what mythology is, unless it’s any religion other than theirs.
Apologetics is a form of argument used by religious literalists. Those of you who are spiritual and not dogmatic about any absolute reading of ancient books of history and philosophy may never have heard of this particular “debate” form, because you’d never think to fight about a spiritual concept. Even being gently religious, you may be less familiar with it than the academics who force themselves to debate fundamentalists.
Christian Apologetics is so insane that it most specifically resembles HIV dogma, in that both are so stupefyingly anti-logical, anti-intuitive and convoluted that at first glance, you think they’ve got to be kidding. You look at their conferences, their defenses, the contortions they perform to get around clear thought, and the faces that they make while doing so, and you think: “This is comedy. You can’t be serious. People cannot truly believe this bullshit. (Have they never seen a single Monty Python sketch??)”
– They have conferences! You can go! Learn! Unlearn!: Catholicanswersconference
Really? You can’t just grow up a little and live on the same planet with everybody else?
Let’s have a look inside the minefield.
Here’s a common argument from Apologetics (and we’ll follow with one from HIV-ology). As convoluted and intentionally misleading, manipulative and self-deluding as this sounds, it is the Number One tactic used in Apologetics today.
“We have such bad evidence that it’s GOT to be true.”
Yup. No. Serious.
The argument goes like this:
“You say that “A” is true, but you have no evidence. You have a few forgeries that you date from 50AD, but everyone else dates them from 230AD. Then there’s some mouse crap that you’ve fluffed up with spray paint and Jello to make it seem like it’s something… but it all deflates and turns to mush. What’s your response?”
Defender of the Faith:
“Indeed! The evidence for our point “A” is so, so, sooo weak… that you must admit that IF someone was going to tell a false story, they would DEFINITELY have invented some BETTER EVIDENCE for their fake story than we have for this story, which clearly has such BAD EVIDENCE to support it that it MUST be TRUE.”
Period. Take out brain. Punt into trash can.
AIDS: The Church of the Poisoned Pill
The AIDS establishment plays its share of games. Mostly this one:
That’s the racket. Now, try to ask a true believer a question, and in response, you’ll be shown the contorted faces of every supposed anti-Christ who ever rocked the Casbah and be met by the screams of every altar boy ever violated by the Holy Fathers while their mothers waited outside the confessionals, thumbing their rosaries…
The AIDS establishment has stolen the Mojo from the Church and now plays it on all of us. It’s the old Catholic game of: “If you don’t believe us, you’re going to HELL!” And, “If you ask us questions, you’re a HERETIC!”
Here’s how that goes:
Thinker: HIV tests aren’t accurate.
AIDS-church: Who says they aren’t accurate? Who? You?! WHO?
T: The test manufacturers, the medical literature. It’s all right here. Have a look.
AC: I’m not looking at that. Where did you get that? You shouldn’t be reading that! Is it peer-reviewed? I’ll bet it’s from the INTERNET!!
T: It’s from the standard medical literature. It is both standard, medical and peer-reviewed, whatever that does for you. And all medical journals are referenced on the Internet.
AC: Well. You sound like one of those DENIERS of SCIENCE! Are you one of those denialists! You sound like a Denialist!! I’m not wasting my time talking to YOU!!!!
Two churches. One goal. Enslave everyone and make a killing doing it.
Swallow hard. Stop thinking.
Liam Scheff is author of “Official Stories,” drilling to the core of the gooey religious center of science, culture and history.